Rhinebeck Child and Family Center, LLC- Building Self-Esteem

Rhinebeck Child and Family Center, LLC Child Therapy Techniques - The Center for Practical Tools for Child and Adolescent Therapists Dr. David A. Crenshaw, Director	NEWS Upcoming Presentations (click)
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For certified translations in any of 8 languages, click here for details.	"Heartfelt Feelings" Coloring Card Strategy. Click here for details.
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Dr. Crenshaw's book Bereavement: Counseling the Grieving throughout the Life Cycle is so successful that it is now in its third printing and earned an average customer rating of from Amazon.com
*Read Dr. Crenshaw's articles in Play Therapy* magazine by clicking on title: "Should I Be Worried?" "Selective Mutism" "Preverbal Trauma" "No Time or Place for Child's Play" "Sounds of Silence" "Symbolism of Windows and Doors in Play Therapy"** with permission of Play Therapy Magazine.
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Dr. Crenshaw's Publications
DVD on Grief
CHILD THERAPY TECHNIQUES:
...Heart Symbol Strategies
...Heartfelt Feelings Coloring Card Kit
...Party Hats on Monsters
...Anger Modulation Drawings
...The Ship Prepares for Voyage
...The Magic Key
...The Fair Trial
...The Tree at the Top of the Hill
...Falling Leaves
...Holiday Writing Exercises
...Three Doors
Articles for Parents and Teachers
Article: Empathic Healer
Article: The Fawns beneath the Gorilla Suits
Article: The Hidden Dimensions
Article: Sounds of Children's Silence
Article: Windows to the Child’s Soul
Article: Selective Mutism
Article: Sealing off the Fountain
Article: by Liana Lowenstein, MSW
Poetry... Musings of the Soul
...Multicultural Language of Healing a Child
About Dr. Crenshaw
Translations

Mailing Address P.O. Box 286 Rhinebeck, NY 12572

Office Address 23H East Market St. Rhinebeck, NY 12572

Phone: (845) 876-3400

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Building Genuine Self-Esteem in Children

By David A. Crenshaw, Ph.D., ABPP

parents and teachers sometimes praise kids too little and sometimes too much. At either extreme, it does not contribute to genuine self-esteem in children. Definitions of self esteem vary widely. The Merriam-Webster On-Line Dictionary defines self-esteem as “a confidence and satisfaction in oneself.”¹ I prefer a definition that is more relational and contextual such as “the sense of value or worth that a person derives from contributing to society or helping others in a meaningful way.” My friend and colleague Dr. Kenneth Hardy, Director of the Eikenberg Institute for Relationships eloquently states, “When we have something of value to offer, to give, to contribute it elevates the spirit. If we have nothing to offer, to give, to contribute it punctures our spirit.”² This relational definition also contains a prescription for how to build self-esteem in children, recognize their valuable and helpful contributions and to encourage them to give to others in meaningful ways. Our sense of place, our belonging in a social group is forged and cemented by what we can contribute.

Researchers have identified “required helpfulness” as a factor contributing to resilience during times of extreme adversity. Katz³ observes” required helpfulness” was observed in war-torn Britain during the constant bombings of World War II. Mental health professionals found that after the bombings ceased citizens who had helped to protect the safety and attended to the needs of others, suffered fewer than expected adverse psychological reactions from the trauma of the aerial bombardment.

References

¹ Merriam-Webster On-Line Dictionary

² Hardy, K. V. (2003). Treating violent adolescents. Presentation at the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium. Washington. DC.

³ Katz, M. (1997). On playing a poor hand well. New York: Norton.